You may have noticed my blog has been a bit quiet over the last few months! I haven’t meant to neglect it, but between doing LOTS of storytelling programs and workshops, completing final proof-reading/edits of my 4th children’s book which is headed to press, and getting ready for the arrival of my little one ANY day now, it has been a bit of a whirlwind. Thankfully, things have finally begun to settle down (the calm before the storm I guess!), and I’ve been able to devote a few days to writing! Oh, how I missed it!
You may recall that I entered the Susanna Leonard Hill Holiday Writing Contest back in December. I had a lot of fun with that and got some great feedback on my story. So when I saw her next challenge seeking Fractured Fairy Tales for the March Madness Writing Contest, I was excited to dive in! The cool part is I’ve had the idea for this story in my head for a long time. In fact, I already had it outlined as a storytelling stage show and some time ago commissioned an artistic friend of mine to develop the costume pieces for it. I’ve just been looking for the right moment to get it out there!
Of course the challenge with this contest is that I had to tell the story in 400 words or less. This required some significant cutting and removing character lines and development that I desperately wanted to keep, but hopefully the essence of the story can still come through!
At any rate, below is my story of The Three Frilly Goats Fluff. I hope you enjoy it. I look forward to your thoughts/feedback. And of course, if you’re interested in the more amplified staged/storytelling version for your school, library, etc; please let me know!
THE THREE FRILLY GOATS FLUFF by Lindsay Bonilla
Trippity-trop – Fluffy’s hooves clacked across the bridge.
“What are you doing on my bridge?” growled the troll living underneath.
“Aren’t you ugly!” said Fluffy. “With that big nose and baaaaad breath, you’ll never attract a girlfriend! Anyway, Mama thinks I’m crossing to find sweet grass, but I’m going to meet the billy goats! They are much cuter over there!”
“Too bad you won’t make it. I’m going to eat you!”
“Wait! My sister’s about to cross. She doesn’t care about billy goats. She’s plumper than I am. She’d make a better meal.”
“Alright, go! But if she doesn’t come, I’ll eat you on your way back.”
Trippity-trop, Muffy’s hooves clacked across the bridge.
“What are you doing on my bridge?”
“Aren’t you uneducated! Only dim-wits speak so rudely. You’ll never find a teacher with that baaad brain! Anyway, Mama thinks I’m crossing to find sweet grass, but I’m going to study with the Goat Guru.”
“Too bad you won’t make it. I’m going to eat you!”
“Wait! My sister’s about to cross. She doesn’t care about learning. She’s plumper than I am. She’d make a better meal.”
“Alright, go! But if she doesn’t come, I’ll eat you on your way back.”
Trippity-trop, Puffy’s hooves clacked across the bridge.
“What are you doing on my bridge?”
“Is someone having a baaad day?” said Puffy. “Why don’t you tell your mommy so she can make you feel better?”
“Mommy? I don’t have a mommy.”
“Don’t have a mommy!? So no one ever sang you lullabies or kissed your boo-boos?”
“No, but it sounds wonderful! If I had a mommy, I’d never leave her side.”
“Mama sent me to find sweet grass, but I’m going to pick her a bouquet!”
“Can I help?” begged Troll.
“Sure! Then we’ll take it to Mommy!”
“Won’t Mommy be afraid of an ugly, stupid troll like me?” he inquired. But Puffy didn’t hear him.
They finished picking the flowers, then Puffy pranced home. Troll followed nervously.
“What beautiful flowers!” cooed Mommy. “And who’s this? . . Don’t be shy. . . What a handsome troll you are! So smart, so lovable!”
Troll never returned to his bridge again. He stayed with Mama Goat who kissed his boo-boos and sang him lullabies every night.
I love it, Lindsay! The vain one, the smart one and the kind one, and what a great twist on the troll, having him go home to Mama and become nice – everyone needs a loving Mama 🙂 Thank you so much for joining in the madness 🙂 And best wishes on the impending arrival of your little one – keep up posted! 🙂
Lindsay, so glad to see this. You know I love it. It will be great for readers theater, too. Good luck. Got your baby countdown going, too. Love, K
Thanks Kathy! And thanks for giving me some great feedback while I was still working on it! You’re right, it would be fun for reader’s theater — especially since it’s mostly dialogue! I’ll definitely have to make a script version!
Thanks Susanna! I’m glad you enjoyed the story and characters. Indeed, Mamas are quite important and I’m excited to experience it first-hand from the other perspective very soon! I’m also glad that I was able to join the madness before my own “madness” begins! 🙂 haha Thanks again for hosting another fun contest!
This was great, Lindsay! Loved the ending!
What a wonderful tale, Lindsay! I love a happy ending. Great job!
Not a baaaaad story! Full of twists and giggles. And just right for Mother’s Day 🙂
I hadn’t even thought about it being a good fit for Mother’s Day, but you are so right!! Thanks for giving me that idea! This would definitely be a fun story to tell at a Mother’s Day storytelling event! 🙂
This is a wonderful retelling of the Billy Goats Gruff. Mama is sure to please. I love it.
I especially love the ending. Great job!
So cute and fun!
Thanks Sylvia!
Who doesn’t LOVE a troll that just wants to be loved.
And the dime-ing out of the siblings…. pricelessly realistic!
Thanks Erika! I love the way you described them as “realistic.” Isn’t that the neat part of folktales and fairy tales? That you can have animal characters who are somewhat off-beat and quirky and yet realistic at the same time! 🙂
Love the idea of three strong-wiled sisters and feel an itch to illustrate them! Good luck!
Thanks! It sure would be fun to see them come to life as illustrations! 🙂
I did a spin on this fairy tale, too! But you kept the cute goats. Love them!
Wendy, yours was the one with the worms and the bird, yes?? I thought that was so clever!! And I love how you found a way to include the timeless adage “the early bird gets the worm” in it! Nice work!
Hello amazing Lindsey!
and
Wow…you are a busy lady…congratulations and best of luck!
What a fun take on the billy goats story…and such a sweet ending…perfect for young kids and story telling programs.:)
Thanks Vivian! I appreciate your encouragement! You all have definitely given me the push I need to get this story out to share with young audiences. Just this week my mom bought me a goat puppet too — so I guess I have NO excuses now!
Cute! I love the title.
Thanks Elliah! I don’t usually have an easy time with titles, so I’m glad this one fit the bill!
I didn’t really care for the first two sisters (which is great writing on your part), but I so adored the final sister. I love how she could see the troll for something more than an mean, ugly monster. Well done, Mama Lindsay!
(Good luck with your storytelling script!)
Aww! I’m glad you liked Puffy! All of the characters were fun to create in their own way, but she is definitely the sweetheart of the bunch!
Fun story. You did a good job distinguishing the personalities!
Thanks Alena! They were fun to create!
First of all, Congratulations on your precious arrival. And boy are you busy?! Now for your story. Oh what a fun read! I so love your characters. They sound a bit like me and my sisters. I won’t say which is which. Anyway, I fell in love with the attitude of the goats. Again, enjoyed this.
That made me laugh that the characters sounded like you and your sisters! haha I’m glad you found them relatable! Isn’t it neat when we find stories that remind us of ourselves and our family members? I love finding myself in a story!
Fabulous retelling. All four characters are strong and funny!
Funny one! Loved the goats responses to the troll. Cute ending.
what a cute take on my old favourite 3 billy goats. well done 🙂
How adorable! What a sweet story.
my daughter and I loved this cute story!
Thanks so much for sharing my story with your daughter! It’s wonderful getting lots of adult feedback, but great to get a child’s perspective on it too!
At last the troll has a friend and someone too look after him. Great ending.
Thanks Rachel!
Here’s another fairy tale that’s more fun than the original. I think your Valley Girl goats are adorable. Love how the Momma goat saves the day.
Thanks Laura! And I had to laugh at your reference to the Valley Girls — that was definitely the inspiration for my first goat girl! As such, I think she would be a very fun character to act out — just one reason I’m eager to begin telling this story!
Aw sweet:-) Maybe the troll will grow up to be nice since he has someone to love him just as he is:-)
I hope so! 🙂 Perhaps there is a sequel in the making! haha
This was a great story. The message is clear, “Everything/Everyone just wants to be loved.” I love the ending and the twist. Thanks for sharing your story. It is appreciated.
Thanks Jackie! I’m glad the message was able to come through in the 400 word limit!
I LOVE this! So well written! 🙂
Awww..glad the troll found someone to love him! Love a happy ending 🙂
Great story Lindsay! I like that you kept the goats… I made them into bunnies. And only a mom could convert a troll!
I love the Goat Guru. I think I need to study with one of those. 🙂
Very clever! Even trolls need to be loved 🙂
Very Nice story!! I always felt bad for the Troll! I love how Mom excepted him in the end, no questions asked! and Happy Labor day to you! God Bless your little one!